At breakfast table one fine day
Aubrey and wife have bills to pay.
The post arrives and it’s more bills:
So many the whole table fills!
A failed inventor earns no cash,
With spending Aubrey’s been too rash.
But what to do? They cannot pay.
So should they hide, or run away?
“Life Interest” due from brother died
Is not enough, so they decide
If Aubrey “dies” it all will go
To cousin George in Mexico.
Said cousin may have died in brawl,
Or may not be deceased at all.
With blasting powder in his shed
Exploded, Aubrey’s surely dead!
But not, of course, he’ll steal away,
Then out of sight a while will stay.
A new identity will forge.
And re-invent as Cousin George.
Louise will play the grieving wife,
Then marry “George” in their new life.
When things are settled, it’s their aim
The whole inheritance to claim.
But problems come to best of schemes,
With no exception this, it seems.
The best laid plans can go awry,
However hard the plotters try!
Friend Jean arrives to comfort bring,
And shock announcement she will spring.
She married George some years ago,
He left her, broke her heart, and so
When “Aubrey-George” returns, she screams
And faints. It is his beard it seems!
Louise is fuming, makes it plain
That “Aubrey-George” must die again.
They’ll make him drown, without a trace.
Only his clothes will mark the place.
Another “problem” with a plan,
In shape, another bearded man –
The Butler’s brother, Henery,
As George, will claim the legacy.
Poor Jean, confused, is sure again
This is her man, and stakes her claim!
Aubrey, of course, who did not drown
Returns as old friend Father Brown.
Then enter real George, (number 3),
Who’s travelled far across the sea.
Jean claims this one as well on sight
At least, this time, she’s got it right!
It’s obvious that she could care
For anyone with facial hair.
The lawyer, Mr Chesterman,
Arrives to do the best he can,
His legal duties to discharge.
Although the legacy was large,
Expenses, fees and gov’ment tax
Reveal some most unpleasant facts,
Have left a very paltry sum.
In total pounds of only one!
With everyone now feeling poor,
Hear creditors are at the door.
Chaotic chases now begin,
With staff and gardener joining in!
A Comedy that’s full of fun,
One of the best that H.A.T. has done,
If you weren’t there you missed a treat.
An evening out that’s hard to beat.
Janet Johnson
